Yep, sensory deprivation is pretty good if you don't want to—or are afraid to—take things further. I can't say that's the case for me, because my friend has a choking fetish, and that was my introduction to hardcore BDSM.
Haha yeah, it's hard to go back once you realize just how much fun territory there is to explore. For me it's the depth of trust/connection, how important communication is, etc. And yeah, the sex obviously lol.
You. I'm onto you. This was your secret plot all along. And I approve. Also, choking OUT is a no-no for me. I'll give someone some tingles, but they're staying conscious. Just too risky.
I remember choking her until she passed out two or three times. The first time she got scared, but she liked it, and the other times were just because she ended up enjoying it, hahaha.
Yeah, part of being responsible is knowing that despite all our skills/knowledge/preparation.... sometimes shit just happens. Not willing to let my partner be seriously injured/die, so some things are just off the table, no matter how calculated the risk.
Yeah, that's scary. Even if things went poorly in a way that didn't lead to death, imagine trying to explain that to someone.
I've done enough judo to have been there and know that it is not what I want in bed. I don't really find air chokes scary anymore, but its not pleasant in the slightes. And a proper blood choke is pointless, get all hot and bothered then out in seconds....
Air chokes are dangerous, that's not sexual choking. It's a blood choke, but you're not clamping down. You're limiting, not cutting off bloodflow. Riding that line.
I know.
I mean, yeah if you pressing hard enough to actually break something (I guess heat of the moment and all), you can cut off air supply way before then. One of the things I learned in judo was that the body panics way more about an air choke (extremely uncomfortable), which you have plenty of time to think and resolve your way through, than a blood choke which will only be mildly uncomfortable then lights out. Resisting the panic and freeing the space to countermove was a thing for air chokes, blood chokes was desperate move then tap.
Yeah, there's a reason it's a fetish, though I'm pretty sure it's closer to a paraphilia. I prefer other things—something where I have more control over the outcome—rather than risking suffocation and hoping my partner comes to. Like I said, I didn't feel comfortable with that; I only did it because she wanted to.
I'm the person that plans for "what if the hotel catches fire or I have a heartattack when you're tied up". Might be .00001% chance, but I just refuse to put anyone through that horror movie. So no real metal cuffs, trauma shears in reach, etc... lots of safety stuff before I even think about playing.
It's really the mental side that appeals most to me. Molding/training, playing the tension/release game, helping someone realize their true inner desires, become someone/something else whether permanently or just for a few hours. Designing the perfect rollercoaster ride for someone, tailoring it in the moment, knowing someone's body/mind that well.
Thats really helpful. Thank you!
I wish I could say the same... But even though I do plan ahead, I take it more seriously. Tight restraints, hot candle wax, CNC—though sometimes the first "C" is a bit blurry—role-playing, humiliation and degradation, pet play... Now that I think about it, maybe I'm even more wicked than she was.
Oh, I do ALL of that lol. I find there's still room for safety protocols without affecting things
Younger me liked the idea of being a little out of control and subby, these days with young'ins around its about taking what you can get and being quiet as can be.
I'm starting to get the image that @Paradigminant is a professional Dom, complete with the tight leathers and whip at hand.
Where there's a will, there's a way lol
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