I kinda don't fully understand the NTR wars. I mean I get the terms, like what each of the various kinds and acts are. I understand the plot points and whole venn diagram of conditions. What I don't get well perhaps why I don't get it I guess; I'm a poly. Not polyamourus as in guy with harem of women but like poly as in just open (but informed) relations. I'll get into why later but like, I don't get that there is such vitrole over the genre.
I get most H gamers are into gonzo and view waifus as personal collection items and yatta yatta "... my precious!". I understand that part. The part I don't get is why people get soo mad over it. If you don't like the story why not just rip the images and make a mod/doujin? Video capturing is fairly easy now (unless you got DRM'd) so reworking animations is much more feasible today, and if a ren'py VN is open ended, you can just cut out the chapters you don't like. With so many solves available why waste time raging?
So, the other aspect of this and why I get confused partly. Modern gen appropriates and changes so much. Cuckholding for example, like originally if you enjoyed watching sex entertainment at all (theater troops would do lewd sex on stage for audiences long before redlight cinema came along), you got deemed a cuckhold. In certain eras these even developed small cults, not cult as in manson family but like mystery cults in classical mythology sense aka proto religions. Which is how in part we got the kama sutra. But point is, if you indulge in porn at all, you are being cuckholded because you are watching someone else have sex rather than having sex. When/how did that become watching cheating or 3 ways/orgies (as observer) =cuck?
I ask because monogamy tends to complicate things, particularly with longer series. There's the cheating aspect, but like basically every soap opera on TV, eventually ppl break up and date other people. If you have a srries long enough (particularly with manga/comics) what is the line between NTR of wife/GF swapping and just having one healthy monogamous relationship moving on to the next?
end note as to why I'm poly. So, if I'm dating someone and my partner is bi, well I have a certain set of equipment. If my partner wants the other set, I can't satisfy that no matter what. Same time we call sexual urges as we do, urges, because they are less than controllable. My partner isn't going to stop wanting that other equipment even if they could change that desire, I can't physically satisfy them the same way. Goal of relationships are to make your partner happy right? Allowing/helping them become satisfied to their needs is a priority I want to provide.
Which brings me to the other half of the poly/cuck dealio. The non bi side of poly. So there are many types of intimate relations obviously but for now lets focus on LTR romantic+intimate side.
We form relationships because we find in others shared interests and by doing those things together what is already enjoyabke becomes more so simply from sharing the experience with another person. Yet each person is different which brings differences in ways the same things are enjoyed. By things I don't mean sex acts I just mean spending time doing things together. Oddly enough, if two people spend enough time together enjoying a hobby or interest and are given the opportunity for privacy together, they will probably have sex.
As to the poly/cuck vector of the above, each person is different and doing the same thing with a different person (time spending wise) creates a unique experience. Think of it like going from just regular acquaintences to BFFs. It is something about the other person and the experience of being with them that changes the relationship.
As to how that applies, say my partner and I go to an arcade. I really enjoy X types of game but my partner prefers Y. Say my partner has a friend that also enjoys Y. Going to the arcade is a very different experience for my partner depending if they go with me or their BFF as result. Eventually my partner may want to be more than just friends with their BFF as a result and have an intimate relationship with them.
My goal is my partner's happiness, and though I could play the Y games my partner likes, I would not actually enjoy those games. Additionally, once my partner develops feelings for their BFF, that attraction and desire will always be there. So, way I see it, imo and my views, is to support my partner(s) by allowing them to seek that satisfaction which I cannot provide that way neither of us build a resentment to one another either from suppressing a want or being forced to like something they/you don't in order to compromise and be changed in ones desire simply to "save face" because in the end I will never really like Y games despite playing them to make my partner happy, no matter how long I play them.
anyway sorry for tldr in closing but idk its a complicated thing to explain and I guess that's the simplest/best attempt I can do in explaining it.
