discussion Pet peeves and notes to writers

[Perverticus]

my biggest gripes is with the step-cest games. usually they come with all this roundabout nonsense to explain why it is stepcest, when all that excess dumb writing for explanation could have been avoided, by simply avoiding patreon. or ones that have loli in it (for "wholesomeness", and the character is just there and does not contribute shit to the overall story or content), but never deliver, because again, patreon.

 

[plainjane]

what I would like to add to this list is;
Too Much story?
some have to describe everything going on.
screen ... I woke up thinking about what to do.
screen... I'm going to get up.
screen ... the floor is cold, I'm almost to the door.

many screens and sentence upon sentence to read,
just to get to the bathroom, but at least I read what color every door I walked by was.
I like a good story but get to it...

yeah who am I to say,
I probably bored the hell out of any one who read this.

I stopped half way through... but agreed!

 

[kemad]

What are some of your pet peeves when it comes to adult VN/games? I'm hoping this thread becomes a useful guide to future creators.

Here are some of the things that have annoyed me recently:

• When the dev talks to the reader in an intro:
  • if you've done a good job creating the game, there is no need for an introduction.
  • nobody wants to hear from you
  • nobody thinks you're as funny as you think you are
  • people want to try the game, not try you.
• characters who repeatedly make decisions like they're complete fucking morons
  • you should give the character the choices that the player would make
  • if you need the MC to make ridiculous decisions to make the plot work, you have a bad plot.
• Don't have all your Love interests look exactly the same.
  • give the player some variety - not everyone likes grotesque ass/boobs.
• Story is the most important!
  • ren'py renders will never compete with an entire internet full of real women doing real things
  • people play these games to become immersed in the story and the world of the game
  • If the only thing you can say about your game is "har har, i made a naked lady", then you game is bad.

I'd be interested in what other people think and to debate this topic.

Thanks!

My biggest pet peeve is when it's clear we're reading a first draft. Grammar problems, spelling mistakes, lack of punctuation, etc. You're writing and making a visual novel, not a twitter post. Just use grammarly or something if you genuinely don't know how to format a fucking sentence. lmao

 

[setzer]

As a Developer, I actually support this. In fact, I encourage everyone who comes in here to actually lay down their thoughts. Developers are constantly trying to get better at what they do. You guys are the judges, the ones we try to please(in a way). Developers will always follow their own paths but learning a few key points from everyone will help us in the long run.

Please don't consider this as an actual complaint but as actual helpful tips for ALL Developers. We learn from the bad more than we do the good.

Since we got a dev in here advocating in the thread I will say this:

PROOFREAD. PROOFREAD. PROOFREAD.

A second set of eyes to make sure you're not fucking the dog on certain phrases, tenses and worst of all bungling the main three (their, there, they're). I've purged many a game on simple spelling mistakes from people who should have an eighth grade level of English.

 

[elfieeven]

My personal pet peeve... please run your script through a spell checker, or have an anal / obsessive typo-finding volunteer read through it. I'm sure there are plenty of forum folks that would gladly volunteer to help out (I would!)

Are you volunteering for any devs that need someone?

 

[poczas]

Are you volunteering for any devs that need someone?

Yes, I'd be willing to help!

 

[Trunk Monkey]

Are you volunteering for any devs that need someone?

I've been known to offer help. As long as the game isn't terrible and doesn't have content that I find distasteful I'm usually up for it. It helps that I have a background in software engineering including lots of experience as a QA engineer.

 

[Trunk Monkey]

My biggest pet peeves: Emojis, Grammar, Spelling, and Punctuation

- Emoji's: Simply put, they do not belong in the dialog. Ever! If you need emoji's to get a point across, the problem is poor writing.
- Grammar and Spelling: At a bare minimum, use a spell checker, then get a few people to proofread and/or playtest. If you've got supporters (Subscribe Star, Patreon), odds are that at least one or two of them would be happy to help.
- Punctuation: Most often it's the misuse, and over use, of ellipses by devs that, clearly, don't know what an ellipsis is, or how to use one.

 

[Tiedye]

I actually don't mind and can find humor and enjoy at times the intros where the dev talks to the player (either as themself, or as a girl avatar), It can provide a bit of exposé better stated at beginning then in-game. Plus all these games may actually be someone's first game so need to know the basics.

Now my pet peeve can be the whole single button choice thing (like "head downstairs" being the only option). Please just have the story continue instead of making us click a single choice button. Sometimes the multiple choices being all the same thing (like " Yes" "YESS" "OF Course YESS" ) if done right can give a chuckle and fun though.

Another pet peeve is the only 4 save slots per page.

I'm sure I have more, but off top fo my head those are the only 2 really.

That is of course my opinions only and at the end of the day, it's the dev's games and their choices of what they want to actually create.

 

[LUVGAMZ23]

The problem with everything AVN related is that, like anything creative, it's show business. Show. Business.

There's a lot of things that are creatively awesome and make money.
Realistically, it's a slider. The more show? The less business. And vice versa.
So to sorta answer the OP:

I'm perfectly happy with Kinetic AVN.
I also hate MC's that HAVE to be stupid.
The above is the show.

BUT

"Lying" about a game being Kinetic and putting false choices MAY give the Dev more money than a pure Kinetic project.
More players MAY prefer a dumb MC and laugh at him/her/them rather than those who like a smart MC.
The above is the business.

Until (if?) I have numbers for the above, I can't tell if a dev is being unwise, or they just want food on the table.

 

[elfieeven]

More players MAY prefer a dumb MC and laugh at him/her/them rather than those who like a smart MC.

If the writer is capable of writing comedy then they can just do that instead. A dumb MC played for laughs just means stupid jokes and bad writing.

 

[Mr. Tearson]

Since we got a dev in here advocating in the thread I will say this:

PROOFREAD. PROOFREAD. PROOFREAD.

A second set of eyes to make sure you're not fucking the dog on certain phrases, tenses and worst of all bungling the main three (their, there, they're). I've purged many a game on simple spelling mistakes from people who should have an eighth grade level of English.

Sorry for the laughing emoji. I just really like the way you worded that. Haha.
But you're right. And one I constantly tell other fellow Developers.

I think the biggest issue with this one is that they type too fast. Most don't write the story beforehand. I can't blame them because you never know what you're able to put in due to the assets available. Not everyone can create these things. I'm no exception, either. Lol.

 

[elfieeven]

I think the biggest issue with this one is that they type too fast. Most don't write the story beforehand. I can't blame them because you never know what you're able to put in due to the assets available. Not everyone can create these things. I'm no exception, either. Lol.

They'd be saving themselves a lot of time if they'd just do a very high level overview for the scenes. If they can't come up with a few lines that describe the goal of each scene and the assets they'll need, then maybe creating an AVN isn't for them.

As a "pantser" writer myself I hate detailed outlines but you better believe I'm doing some high level work so it doesn't turn into a disaster.

 

[Mr. Tearson]

They'd be saving themselves a lot of time if they'd just do a very high level overview for the scenes. If they can't come up with a few lines that describe the goal of each scene and the assets they'll need, then maybe creating an AVN isn't for them.

As a "pantser" writer myself I hate detailed outlines but you better believe I'm doing some high level work so it doesn't turn into a disaster.

Aye. Some Devs don't even do this. Lol. I mean... It is kind of part of a marketing scheme, IMO. Where they attempt to milk off the game without ever finishing it.

Better we show our skills and remain respectful to our donators and fans.

 

[Uncle Loco]

I will speak from experience having a proofreader can make a huge difference in your story. The big problem is most can't afford a proofreader, and free options like spell/grammar checks in word processors or free add-ons like Grammarly don't always catch or fix the issues. You may get a volunteer to help you out but how do you know you can trust them with your story?

 

[Mr. Tearson]

I will speak from experience having a proofreader can make a huge difference in your story. The big problem is most can't afford a proofreader, and free options like spell/grammar checks in word processors or free add-ons like Grammarly don't always catch or fix the issues. You may get a volunteer to help you out but how do you know you can trust them with your story?

Trust is extremely hard to come by. Could be some asshole willing to rip you off the moment they get the script. I've been pretty careful, myself, about who I allow into my circle. Though, I'm doing the whole workload. From writing to coding to rendering. It's not easy but as long as I reach my goal, I'm happy. Good thing I kind of have my story set in a Texas tone type of shit. Well, a mixture. Whatever.

(Also, we're kind of going off topic Lmao)

Would be nice if Developers all around would be just as determined as some of us in taking this path. A story left unfinished is a life unfulfilled.

 

[Karamchad]

Excessive exposure, long lines of unnecessary information that seems so out of place.

 

[langy77]

Devs can do what they want. I am more likely interested in a variety of LIs as the OP is, and less strange choices, but I don't rate most of these as "fine art," so my standards are much lower. My pet peeve has more to do with lack of buildup to sex events. I want the touching, kissing, making out part, too.

 

[bv220040]

abnormal sized breasts and dicks, no skip dialogue and no gallery

 

[MattShizzle]

Number one is blueballing. As in slow burn or in some cases glacial burn or no burn.
In general things I HATE that are in far too many - cartoon looking, futa, ntr, fantasy, blackmail. In female protag games - her being victimized and usually by an old, fat ugly bastard. Or it's lesbian only. In male protag games MC being either stupid, a simp or an asshole. How about a guy who isn't a simp or moron, but treats women right?
Oh, and having to get around Patreon's stupid rules with that "landlady" and "roommate" shit.