Yay, I just got my
Members+ admittance ticket!
OK. Now I'm kind of interested in the new Nickname. I think you can change it once every... three? six? months.
Well, it's still something one could call low creative, but it's a translation to english of a wordplay with my first name and something I really like (and which is commonly used as a nickname for girls with my name):
Chamomile (or, when it's already taken, i use
SoothingChamomile, which describes both the tea and my personality, but I think it's a bit too long)
Which one would you suggest using here?
Hi Kironos.
Haven't see you here before so welcome!
Hello there! Thank you!
Please keep reading, I like to split up quotes by topic, there's more below
I get similar to this and it sucks. Days I can stay in bed late I wake up early, days I need to get up early I feel like I could sleep for days.
I also suffer a bit from anxiety and depression at times (as I expect a lot of people here do) so if you ever need people to talk to I'm here or I'm sure you'll easy find another person round here willing to talk things through with you.
I have bipolar depression, ADHD, general anxiety and social anxiety and I'm looking into autism (which I self diagnosed, if that counts). I feel tired all the time, no matter how much or little sleep I get. I do take a sleeping med (along with other meds), which does help get me to sleep and keep me asleep. I went for a sleep study and they said I have minor sleep apnea, but not bad enough to get a CPAP machine.
That's a lot to face, you're so strong!

I'm taking melatonin gummies, but they don't really do much. I guess that creating a routine and convincing myself that it will help could be having a slight placebo effect and making me a little bit more relaxed when going to bed
I actually haven't been diagnosed with anything (I haven't really sought for help about any of this), but I'm seeing a psychotherapist for a different reason and she made me fill up a questionnaire of a little bit more than 500 true/false questions about me (which I found extremely hard to answer to, since I hate absolutes and prefer when I can give an answer in the range "totally disagree" to "totally agree") and she told me something along the lines of "
[...] with a slight depressive tendency" when reading the results to me (I had the feeling that she said it more slowly than the other parts).
Anyways, I find it absurd that these tests only consider
active su****al ideation and not the
passive variant (thinking that if something
bad happened to me, it would be okay and solve all my problems), which is how I sometimes feel
And let's not start talking about social anxiety, for example, I struggle even with just the thought of starting a conversation or saying hi to someone, even people I already know. And just awkwardly wait for them to interact with me first. I tend to listen rather than speaking because I just can't come up with what to say and I'm terrified of conflict, so I avoid certain topics and just shut up whenever I think my opinion (on anything) could be different than the other person
so if you ever need people to talk to I'm here or I'm sure you'll easy find another person round here willing to talk things through with you.
Anyways, I know what it's like and my DM's are always open.
Thank you both for your availability, I believe that talking to someone who's going through the same thing might do me good!

But knowing myself, I doubt I could even find the courage to send a DM first (yeah, it's
that bad), but when I start talking, I end up going overboard with how much I say