For me, the most important thing about milf is the maternal aspect. No matter if she has big or small breasts, a little younger or older. She has to be loving and caring.
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I can understand your point of view. What is fuckable and what is not differs greatly from person to person. But these 20-year-old ‘step moms’ really aren't milfs.
And maternal care should not be forgotten. the "mommy factor" can also be a big part of the milf kink.