discussion VN Ren'Py [HS] Lost & Found [v1.1 Part 2] [Junior72]

[hrmm]

This is pretty nitpicky (more amused observation than actual criticism), but some of the details of the timeline that were added to make it feel more grounded don't add up if you look too close at them.

So the MC says that he's been playing WoW since it first came out, which was in November 2004. This would make him 7 when he started playing (his birthday is October 25, 1997). A bit young, but not unbelievable. The last expansion he had played was Mists of Pandaria. Now, if the whole saving Kylie/Nick selling the computer thing happened during the three weeks between MC's birthday and the release of Warlords of Draenor, then he'd be 17 at the oldest. It's also mentioned that when this all happened, the MC was still in high school; so that matches up with the age. This is all fine.

The car accident though. MC was supposedly 5 when that happened. Now let's assume that Susan did the whole "recover from her injuries/suffer nightmares/meet Derek and fall in love" thing in a record-setting 3 months. Another 9 months for the pregnancy and this means that the MC is at least 6 years older than Amie/Kylie. On top of that, Kylie is the younger sister, so even more for her unless they're twins. Which would mean the MC was having the online romance with Kylie when she was 10 or 11 (and younger, assuming the relationship took time to develop).

Are we sure the MC plays WoW, and not Smash Bros?

 

[Junior72]

Thanks for the observation. I'll keep that all in consideration, but bear in mind that in all online relationships through gaming age usually doesn't matter to most. As far as the WoW expansion issues are concerned, MC could've easily used a school or college computer to play. It's just not written in.

 

[Therply]

Really enjoying the game so far. I like how the incest aspect is more subtle than in most games with that tag, and all the characters are quite likable. The soundtrack is also very well chosen, maybe better than any other VN I've seen. The soundtrack fits the scenes so well that I initially wondered if they could possibly be original compositions. (And thanks for including the original tracks, with tagged artists, in the download.)

I noticed that the "s1-10a" image isn't being found (in v0.7.5). There's an image called "s1-10a - Copy.webp" in the game files; maybe it's misnamed? I also see a few other images with "Copy" in their filename (all in s15), maybe also check if those are misnamed.

Looking forward to seeing where the story leads.

I also noticed some odd English syntax:

Spoiler: dialogue

The train journey takes you about over 4 hours to complete.

"about over 4 hours" seems like odd syntax, I'm not sure if that's an editing typo or if your native language isn't English. (I'm guessing the former since the vast majority of the text looks like the work of a native speaker.) Either way, maybe worth tweaking it.

Pleased to meet you , I'm Marion.

The space before the comma is nonstandard English.

 

[Junior72]

Really enjoying the game so far. I like how the incest aspect is more subtle than in most games with that tag, and all the characters are quite likable. The soundtrack is also very well chosen, maybe better than any other VN I've seen. The soundtrack fits the scenes so well that I initially wondered if they could possibly be original compositions. (And thanks for including the original tracks, with tagged artists, in the download.)

I noticed that the "s1-10a" image isn't being found (in v0.7.5). There's an image called "s1-10a - Copy.webp" in the game files; maybe it's misnamed? I also see a few other images with "Copy" in their filename (all in s15), maybe also check if those are misnamed.

Looking forward to seeing where the story leads.

I also noticed some odd English syntax:

Spoiler: dialogue

"about over 4 hours" seems like odd syntax, I'm not sure if that's an editing typo or if your native language isn't English. (I'm guessing the former since the vast majority of the text looks like the work of a native speaker.) Either way, maybe worth tweaking it.



The space before the comma is nonstandard English.

Thanks for the kind words Therply. If you rename that image to just "s1-10a" that should fix the issue. Also if some English appears non-standard, that's because I'm Australian. Our English slightly differs to UK or US in some aspects.

 

[Nastastic]

I'm Australian.

Best keep those tits nice and big and all ages and roles unambiguously adult then (30 or older to be safe, maybe throw in some wrinkles, graying hair and saggy tits), lest you go the way of Westy, thanks to your country's asinine laws. Better safe than sorry as long as you're stuck there.

 

[Junior72]

Best keep those tits nice and big and all ages and roles unambiguously adult then (30 or older to be safe, maybe throw in some wrinkles, graying hair and saggy tits), lest you go the way of Westy, thanks to your country's asinine laws. Better safe than sorry as long as you're stuck there.

I'm pretty much safe as all my characters are 18+. They're mainly chasing the ones using minors for entertainment.

 

[Therply]

Thanks for the kind words Therply. If you rename that image to just "s1-10a" that should fix the issue. Also if some English appears non-standard, that's because I'm Australian. Our English slightly differs to UK or US in some aspects.

Interesting, are the two examples I gave standard Australianisms? (Reason I ask is that if those are actual typos, then I can report more if I notice any later, whereas if they're intentional Australianisms, then there's no point in reporting anything else I notice along those lines. Also I'm just genuinely curious, as my knowledge of Australia-specific regional English differences isn't very strong, and I enjoy learning such things.)

 

[hrmm]

Interesting, are the two examples I gave standard Australianisms? (Reason I ask is that if those are actual typos, then I can report more if I notice any later, whereas if they're intentional Australianisms, then there's no point in reporting anything else I notice along those lines. Also I'm just genuinely curious, as my knowledge of Australia-specific regional English differences isn't very strong, and I enjoy learning such things.)

So I actually know what happened with the "about over 4 hours" bit; it's the classic error of accidentally leaving in a word while editing/rewriting. When 0.7.0 came out and had the missing image and typo issues, I did a compare of the script with 0.6 to see if anything else might be broken and that kinda sorta turned into me replaying the entire game and proofreading the whole thing as I went along (Junior72, I know you've had issues with people sending in rewritten/edited scripts; I promise there are no rewrites, just typo/bug fixes).

Anyway, the script used to say "about 4½ hours". However, the font that is used for dialogue doesn't show the ½, along with other things like é. 0.7.0/0.7.0c replaced the é's from café/fiancé/fiancée with normal e's, but the ½ escaped notice and stayed in. Then it got removed in 0.7.5 and likely the dev was choosing between "about 4 hours"/"over 4 hours" and left a word in by accident.

And the space before commas is likely just a typo; there's only three instances of it in the script, the rest are fine. Good eye, I didn't catch those.

 

[Therply]

So I actually know what happened with the "about over 4 hours" bit; it's the classic error of accidentally leaving in a word while editing/rewriting. When 0.7.0 came out and had the missing image and typo issues, I did a compare of the script with 0.6 to see if anything else might be broken and that kinda sorta turned into me replaying the entire game and proofreading the whole thing as I went along (Junior72, I know you've had issues with people sending in rewritten/edited scripts; I promise there are no rewrites, just typo/bug fixes).

Anyway, the script used to say "about 4½ hours". However, the font that is used for dialogue doesn't show the ½, along with other things like é. 0.7.0/0.7.0c replaced the é's from café/fiancé/fiancée with normal e's, but the ½ escaped notice and stayed in. Then it got removed in 0.7.5 and likely the dev was choosing between "about 4 hours"/"over 4 hours" and left a word in by accident.

And the space before commas is likely just a typo; there's only three instances of it in the script, the rest are fine. Good eye, I didn't catch those.

Thanks for the corroboration, makes sense. In that case, I'll continue to report whatever typos I might run into, unless Junior72 voices disagreement with your assessment. And yeah, I'm not interested in rewrites or substantive changes, just fixes for things that look like unintentional typos. I certainly wouldn't want anyone pressuring me to rewrite fiction that I authored.

 

[SeveredRealms]

Mirrors added.

 

[SeveredRealms]

Links added to OP and pushed to latest updates for you.

 

[User_2828]

Nah, hard pass. The original version by Killer7 is far better.

 

[hansdampf788]

Nah, hard pass. The original version by Killer7 is far better.

Well the story of MNF has some plotholes and after Killer introduced the grandma the writing went downhill because too much centered around her.

 

[User_2828]

Well the story of MNF has some plotholes and after Killer introduced the grandma the writing went downhill because too much centered around her.

That is your opinion and you are welcome to it.

 

[SeveredRealms]

Lets not forget too many "side" girls..... to the point he is now cutting them out of the vn all while a few where introduced and are now left hanging or completely forgotten in the epilogue. So lets see where this one goes before you judge it. To me the story line is ok.. not great but ok and at least is not as convolutes as K7s... Before you come at me with anything I do not support this dev but do support K7 soo take that as you will.

 

[hansdampf788]

Lets not forget too many "side" girls..... to the point he is now cutting them out of the vn all while a few where introduced and are now left hanging or completely forgotten in the epilogue. So lets see where this one goes before you judge it. To me the story line is ok.. not great but ok and at least is not as convolutes as K7s... Before you come at me with anything I do not support this dev but do support K7 soo take that as you will.

The sidegirls thing is so true (typical harem game mistake of having too many girls). I haven't played MNF since he slowed down with the updates (making 2 games simultaneously is always a bad idea). Back then even the "main girls" content was everything but equally split, the 3 redheads had more content than all the other girls combined.

I haven't played Lost & Found yet but I hope it's good.

 

[LewdLewy]

In line with other comments in this thread, I also took issue with how meandering the direction of MNF went and am looking for an alternative. That being said, I have no idea what anyone in here means when referring to storyline or relationships regarding Lost and Found. No disrespect intended to the devs of either game or anyone else here reading, but this game is a western nukiage. I've played games where the plot was rushed and pacing was stuck at breakneck speed, but the pace for this game is whole other level of "get on with it!" There's barely an exchange of a few sentences before the characters fall massively "in love" with the MC. Honestly, slapping in a few mind control lines that the MC thinks every so often would make far more sense, but that would kind of ruin the MNF vibe.

With all the renders this game has, it could be so much more than it is and could possibly rival the source material, but the bones need meat first. I once did a simple text replacement to give the game Hot Sand of Antarctica a better translation for the scripts of the first 2 chapters. I showed the dev how to use the same tools I did and they took it from there. However, that game already had an acceptably deep plot and mainly needed non-broken English. I wonder if a more extensive overhaul could be done for Lost and Found.

I'm torn because MNF leaves so much unresolved and doesn't have the renders to fix that, which means many of side character scenes would have to be cut out because they end up going nowhere. Lost and Found could be a decent replacement but an overhaul of it would entail combing through everything, rewrite the scenes, and rearrange the renders. And, after doing all that work, there is no guarantee that the next release is compatible in a way that doesn't heavily conflict with a story overhaul mod.

I wish the core of MNF could be saved, but turning either Lost and Found or MNF into a cohesive story from start to finish would require a ton of unpaid hours.

 

[ramvivat]

this is no good.
1 The head of the family sits at the head of the table, and at the moment the head of the family is the Mother.
She, according to etiquette, should sit in such a place. not a daughter. maybe her son, when he is recognized as the Man of the house, but something tells me that he is not capable of being the head of the family. because
2 he is submissive. he allowed Kylie to make him hard and did not think of persuading (or simply insisting) his girlfriend to give him relief, since falling asleep with an erect penis is still torture.. perhaps he decided to let Kylie take the lead in the family, allowed her to dominate?
but hey no "female domination" tag in game tag-list!


heh, well it is, it was like I was looking into water. Kylie sat in the place of the head of the family and MC sat on the side, he would be her errand boy, which, obviouslu, knows nothing about self-respect.
The mother, apparently, has withdrawn from the role of head of the family.

poor Knight - he get worst kind of princesses, who not cherish him.

this is no good.
i'm slightly disappointed.

 

[ramvivat]

It is truly said - be afraid of your desires, because desires sometimes come true! =)

author, thank you for showing MC’s face. I haven’t seen him yet - I wanted to see him when I played My New Family (MNF) from Killer7. I wantED it - now I don’t want it anymore, because I’ve seen my fill of this disgusting face of MC.
and now I agree with Killer7’s desire not to show the face of his MC from MNF haha...
apparently he cherished the sense of beauty among those who read his VN MNF.

about MC's face - God, what a freak. He’s not particularly attractive anyway (take the hands off those who created his model), but in the shower scene with three girls, sisters and mother - he’s there “in all the glory” of his ugly face =)


Thanks again, author, for showing his face. I'm serious.

 

[TheRoyalHunter2022]

Any progress on what to come?