What is your favorite sex ad?

[Munder_Score]

So, look, I like pornography, real people, fake people, fur people, vague abstractions barely recognizable as people...when you get to be my age there is nothing in this world that doesn't hold some sexual fascination. I might, if it were possible, fuck a sunset or at least I'd play a game where a guy has a harem containing several sunsets, a waning gibbous and perhaps an eclipse or 2, I do not discriminate and I can imagine fucking anything. I'm an easy going guy, so I even like sexy ads. I like to be told that there is one five minute trick that can grow my penis 3000%, with a picture of a bottle of apple cider vinegar and a ripped dude menacingly pointing a terrifying veiny penis at me. It makes me feel like there is hope, that if for some reason I too wanted a terrifying veiny penis that all I'd have to do is click on that ad and maybe go buy some apple cider vinegar. Anyway right now my favorite ad goes something like this :

There is this female voice that asserts that there are hundreds if not thousands of horny old women near me. This in and of itself isn't disturbing, as I said I'm sex positive , perhaps overly so. However the video goes on to insist that if I sign up to this service(?) that I must fuck these old women upon request, no matter how ugly or disgusting I find them to be. While it doesn't outright describe any particular punishment that I might face, it does heavily insinuate that there will be consequences. While this video is essentially threatening me with a good time, there is what amounts to a slideshow of fairly benign elderly women in various states of undress. I think this ad could be massively improved if they were to find or create images of more menacing elderly women. You see, the true brilliance of this ad is in the assertion that you can consign yourself to some De Sadesque elderly matriarch based sexual slavery ring, and if you fail to lick some repulsive old twat's twat you will receive some punishment that is actually worse than sticking your tongue in her decrepit old quim in the first place. What that punishment could be, I do not know , but I love how it is left ambiguous. Still it should have pictures of fragile pale young men being absolutely dominated by elderly women in bdsm inspired floral house dresses or perhaps strapped into some kind of rocking chair based sexual apparatus. Anyway, what sexy ads get your imagination going?

 

[User_100467]

I like my sex without the ads please

 

[AlphaKings]

I like my sex without the ads please

I like my sex sponsored by RAID SHADOW LEGENDS!!!!!! Rahhhh!!!

 

[User_104722]

Funniest ones are about the old ugly women in my area to fuck, and if I say no, they ban the account you make. Wierd ad though but funny

 

[Munder_Score]

I like my sex sponsored by RAID SHADOW LEGENDS!!!!!! Rahhhh!!!

I've actually played this game, but I gave up on it because there was so little sexual contact. I've never seen ads for it in the context of porn, but I like to approach every game as if it contains explicit sex. Enough about me though, please elaborate on why you enjoy these ads in a sexual context?

 

[Munder_Score]

I like my sex without the ads please

Well, I won't begrudge you for holding that position, However I would argue that some of the ads themselves contain sex and are in a very real sense porn themselves. Now I'm not one to tell people how to live their lives, but sometimes a perspective shift can open one up to brave new vistas. In this spirit I'd challenge you to try finding the sexual appeal of advertisements and instead of treating them as interrupting your erotic experience, you could treat them as if your partner decided to introduce another person into a sexual engagement as a sort of sexy surprise to spice things up. What, I ask, is sexier than going into a sexual encounter expecting one thing and instead having an entirely different sexual experience thrust upon you (or in some cases into you). You, my friend ,are living in an age where you can click on a video that claims to be a hot teen giving her dad a secret blowjob under the kitchen counter, and as a bonus first you get to watch 5 to 30 seconds of 2 other women giving a voracious testicular tongue lashing to a gentleman who seems utterly gobsmaked by the unfolding events. Why when I was a young boy I couldn't have imagined that there would be a world where my sex would be interrupted by more sex, my young mind didn't dare imagine something so fantastical. So, I advise you to enjoy it, this is a golden age my dear boy.


Love,
Munder

 

[Munder_Score]

Funniest ones are about the old ugly women in my area to fuck, and if I say no, they ban the account you make. Wierd ad though but funny

I mostly agree, though the version that you are referring to explicitly states the consequences, which I think lessens the overall psychological impact of the ad. For me the idea that these sick twists over at this spinster fuck cult will simply ban you sets them on par with some run of the mill reddit moderator. It only crosses over into cosmic horror when these sick fucks insinuate that there are fates worse than weepily dragging your fear dehydrated tongue across the wrinkled landscape of some aged sex fiend's shriveled bosom. Can you imagine tearfully pleasuring some toothless hag, her creaky moans filling the air in a pitched battle with the aroma of mothballs wafting up from the floral duvet that she brought out of storage just to have her dilapidated time parched gash pummeled by a frightened young man who's terrified of some unknown retribution? No, banning an account is a consequence of responding to a tweet with a racial slur , it is not a punishment fitting a rent-free rent boy's pathetic attempt to salvage some sense of dignity by rejecting a sexual encounter with some bedraggled pervert.


Love,
Munder

 

[Jandu]

I like my sex sponsored by RAID SHADOW LEGENDS!!!!!! Rahhhh!!!

This one or Hero Wars

 

[Munder_Score]

This one or Hero Wars

Ah, Hero Wars, I have actually been working on a book, and analysis of the sexual politics and norms being promoted by advertisements for Hero Wars. I have noticed (as I'm sure you have given your obvious appreciation of these ads), a common motif of various female coded creatures consuming a queue of male coded entities until the protagonist himself crosses this rubicon and is not consumed, but instead in a subversion of expectations this turns out to be the first step of a fantastical journey. The implicit sexual metaphysics are clear as I'm sure you've noticed, and I cannot help but wonder if the developers of Hero Wars were not influenced by interpretations of 19th century Rosicrucian phallicism and the works of Hargrave Jennings or Emile Durkheim. While I have never subscribed to the notion that to enter the feminine is to engage in a spiritually consumptive exchange of the phallus with the aethereal feminine vis-a-vi dissapative transposition, But I have a feeling that you might given your proclivity for this particular advertising paradigm. Of course you can feel free to correct me if i'm wrong. To your credit however, I too have noticed the symbolic similarities given that those "men" that are consumed in the encounters depicted in these ads are frequently adorned with the accoutrements of knights of European heritage. I cannot strictly say that this isn't a direct allusion to the Kabbalistic developments and parallels insinuated by Crowley or Ravallier, and I'd be willing to discuss that with you in depth, but at this time I do consider the link tenuous at best. I think that where we can both agree is in the fact the those Hero Wars ads are sexually compelling and they enhance masturbation even if the erotic occultism it asserts is not entirely coherent.

 

[lily1155]

this gives me an incredible idea for a porn game, like one of those ones with a female protagonist that has somewhat violent bad ends for people who are into noncon except the ending is genuinely horrifying and deeply upsetting to most people and not at all meant to be hot. not disparaging anyone who might still be into it but just combine all the things that have extremely niche audiences and typically disgust most people and put no effort into making it appealing. openly making it as rancid and desexualised, awkward and painful to sit though.


you press the close button but it's programmed to just start back up again at the same point if you do. there's no way out and you're forced to awkwardly watch for a good 5 minutes as this sickly old woman fumbles around with her tools awkwardly deciding which one would be best as the protagonist narrates the extreme pain they're in tied up after this old woman finished shitting in her mouth and decided to remove her limbs and fucked it up and hit the bone and their saw just isn't going through it. genuinely punishing you for failing in this really extended horrifying way that's nothing like it's usual ones you're meant to be horny about. it would have to do something to mark that certain bad ends are really fucked up and unpleasant actually because people who play these kinds of games like getting the bad ends on purpose and they'd be really upset if they saw something intentionally unappealing but i think it'd be such a funny way for those games to find a way to actually punish you and make you want to win in games where losing is often kind of the point and where most of the fun happens x3

 

[Munder_Score]

this gives me an incredible idea for a porn game, like one of those ones with a female protagonist that has somewhat violent bad ends for people who are into noncon except the ending is genuinely horrifying and deeply upsetting to most people and not at all meant to be hot. not disparaging anyone who might still be into it but just combine all the things that have extremely niche audiences and typically disgust most people and put no effort into making it appealing. openly making it as rancid and desexualised, awkward and painful to sit though.


you press the close button but it's programmed to just start back up again at the same point if you do. there's no way out and you're forced to awkwardly watch for a good 5 minutes as this sickly old woman fumbles around with her tools awkwardly deciding which one would be best as the protagonist narrates the extreme pain they're in tied up after this old woman finished shitting in her mouth and decided to remove her limbs and fucked it up and hit the bone and their saw just isn't going through it. genuinely punishing you for failing in this really extended horrifying way that's nothing like it's usual ones you're meant to be horny about. it would have to do something to mark that certain bad ends are really fucked up and unpleasant actually because people who play these kinds of games like getting the bad ends on purpose and they'd be really upset if they saw something intentionally unappealing but i think it'd be such a funny way for those games to find a way to actually punish you and make you want to win in games where losing is often kind of the point and where most of the fun happens x3

What a splendid idea 1155. I've always found the lack of authentic consequences in games in general to be wanting. It can be jarring Particularly in some VN's due to subject matter, setting and the emphasis on choice. To be clear I do not mean realistic consequences necessarily, especially considering that realistic consequences for an elven mage choosing to employ a dark magical tome to retrieve the amulet of prophecy are morally ambiguous if not entirely indecipherable....But similar to John Landis' famous retort to the question of how you kill a vampire, in such a fictional scenario the consequences and morality can be whatever best serves the narrative. That being said while I like the way you are thinking, I would enjoy such a scene in many circumstances that are entirely divorced from some constructed moral fabric of the game. What if you spend your entire playthrough being assiduously observant of the moral constitution of this virtual universe, yet still by mere chance you are seized by this diabolical organization and forced into this bizarre and repulsive form of sexual servitude. I don't know how sexy or funny it would be to anyone else, but being confronted by the artificiality and fragility of our "innate" sense of Justice and fairness gives me a delightfully hilarious orgasm every time.

Another idea, perhaps you are not simply forced to watch a single sexual assault that many would find devoid of sexual appeal, but to continue in this piteous circumstance over the course of a long captivity. I believe that if the writing were strong enough it is possible that an indelible mark might be left on the player. Perhaps through writing and other observables this debauched old woman could be given depth, pathos and charm that resonates both with the player character and the player. Wouldn't it indeed be funnier if the player actually left the game with a sense of both hatred and disgust for their virtual abuser, but also a sense of connection and fondness? I'm not calling your idea shallow, don't get me wrong I like it, but why not keep pushing? Instead of commenting on the sandbox morality the author creates, force the player to confront the reality that sometimes, quite often in fact, monsters are people too. The complexity of emotions that one might feel for and about their abusers, and the conflicted sexuality of both abuser and victim is a valuable empathic tool, but i'd also argue it is a valuable lens through which one can explore both their solitary sexual experiences and those they share with a consenting partner.


Look, I don't know if you or anyone will read this much less truly consider whatever the fuck it is I'm talking about, but I am genuinely fascinated by this medium (VN's). It seems to be an area that has so much unexplored landscape to not merely transmit ideas, but to foment them. Yes, subversion of expectations and the sort of light trauma you described are great mechanism that are available to the creator in this medium, but there is so much more available material in this very particular environment. This is truly both my great disappointment and great hope with VN's so far. I like where your head is, I love you, and I'm in love with you.



Smoochies,
Munder

 

[Munder_Score]

Is it just me or does anyone else get chills when those Jerkmate ads threaten that I'll never jerk off alone again? Like, Why the fuck would I want that? It honestly sounds like a real monkeys paw sort of situation. I like jerking off alone, I feel like I want to jerk off alone most of the time and its a nice little spicy garnish when I'd occasionally want someone to, I guess watch me jerk off and moan and stuff and talk about how wet she is? It also seems pretty boring though, like I don't know for sure, but there has to be some limit on the impactful & creative ways someone can tell you that their pussy is wet. Don't get me wrong I'm not trying to yuck anybody's yum here, but once I jerked off to a math lecture about vieta jumping and it stuck with me far more than virtually anything anyone has ever said to me during sex....again not that I have sex, I'm just saying that the hypothetical things I've imagined people saying to me during imaginary sex isn't very memorable. Anyway, maybe I'll try the Jerkmate free trial, I hope it has 2 way video, it would be interesting to have a stranger pretend that they are turned on as I jerk off while explaining what I think is interesting about brachistochrones.... actually that sounds really hot.

Love,
Munder

 

[lily1155]

What a splendid idea 1155. I've always found the lack of authentic consequences in games in general to be wanting. It can be jarring Particularly in some VN's due to subject matter, setting and the emphasis on choice. To be clear I do not mean realistic consequences necessarily, especially considering that realistic consequences for a elven mage choosing to employ dark magical tome to retrieve the amulet of prophecy are morally ambiguous if not entirely indecipherable....But similar to John Landis' famous retort to the question of how you kill a vampire, in such fictional scenario the consequences and morality can be whatever best serves the narrative. That being said while I like the way you are thinking, I would enjoy such a scene in many circumstances that are entirely divorced from some constructed moral fabric of the game. What if you spend your entire playthrough being assiduously observant of the moral constitution of this virtual universe, yet still by mere chance you are seized by this diabolical organization and forced into this bizarre and revulsive form of sexual servitude. I don't know how sexy or funny it would be to anyone else, but being confronted by the artificiality and fragility of our "innate" sense of Justice and fairness gives me a delightfully hilarious orgasm every time.

Another idea, perhaps you are not simply forced to watch a single sexual assault that many would find devoid of sexual appeal, but to continue in this piteous circumstance over the course of a long captivity. I believe that if the writing were strong enough it is possible that an indelible mark might be left on the player. Perhaps through writing and other observables this debauched old woman could be given depth, pathos and charm that resonates both with the player character and the player. Wouldn't it indeed be funnier if the player actually left the game with a sense of both hatred and disgust for their virtual abuser, but also a sense of connection and fondness? I'm not calling your idea shallow, don't get me wrong I like it, but why not keep pushing? Instead of commenting on the sandbox morality the author creates, force the player tp confront the reality that sometimes, quite often in fact, monsters are people too. The complexity of emotions that one might feel for and about their abusers, and the conflicted sexuality of both abuser and victim is a valuable empathic tool, but i'd argue a valuable lens through which can explore both their solitary sexual experiences and those they share with consenting partner.


Look, I don't know if you or anyone will read this much less truly consider whatever he fuck it is I'm talking about, but I am genuinely fascinated by this medium (VN's). It seems to be an area that has so much unexplored landscape to not merely transmit ideas, but to foment them. Yes, subversion of expectations and the sort of light trauma you described are great mechanism that are available to the creator in this medium, but there is so much more available material in this very particular environment. This is truly both my great disappointment and great hope with VN's so far. I like where your head is, I love you, and I'm in love with you.



Smoochies,
Munder

bwahaha this is brilliant! make the reader unable to tell if the experience was awful and disturbing or compelling and fun xD ironically the way you imagine the reader feeling about the experience somewhat also describes how someone abused by someone close to them might feel about that person. that genuinely sounds like something that would have a lot of artistic merit... and i AM already learning to draw and code... hmmm hmmm much to think about!

smoochies to you too strange man i don't know!

 

[Munder_Score]

bwahaha this is brilliant! make the reader unable to tell if the experience was awful and disturbing or compelling and fun xD ironically the way you imagine the reader feeling about the experience somewhat also describes how someone abused by someone close to them might feel about that person. that genuinely sounds like something that would have a lot of artistic merit... and i AM already learning to draw and code... hmmm hmmm much to think about!

smoochies to you too strange man i don't know!

It warms the cockles of my cold shriveled heart that you read and responded 1155. The analogy to the real life and often counterintuitive complexity of abuse psychology is my point exactly, and it is precisely a facet of what gives it empathic value. yes, I agree that it is meritorious in the context of art, moreover I believe that philosophically difficult boners are far too rare; devastating sexual climaxes that pick you apart and leave you to rebuild your sense of self and how your gears enmesh with others is often relegated to traumatic sexual assaults and the like, but I ask, must it be so? can not digital simulation augment and offload the juicy bits to our own computational juicy bits? a collaboration, a concert, yeah?

It is exciting that you are learning to code and draw, and that you are thinking. I hope that you pursue this, if not exactly then something else that violates the margins and paradigms of the medium. It is very appealing to me, the possibility of you or anyone creating something of delightfully vertiginous eroticism, this is my hope for you, and for me, for us, for all of us.

oh, to have my smoochies returned, truly a red letter day. I've been told that I'm difficult to know, called a sphinxlike cenobite without the lame orthodoxy, its not true though, I'm an extremely simple algorithm that repeats the same abecedarian operations on everything I come across. What i'm trying to say is, marry me.


Twitterpated,
Munder

 

[Dragon6969]

brazzers

 

[Munder_Score]

brazzers

there it is! its like we heard you like sex, so we put sex in your sex so you can sex while you sex. It is deliciously recursive, so for me brazzers from a strictly capitalist marketing standpoint, has found the local maximum if not the global one.

 

[Loliholic]

I prefer the ones my ad blocker hides from me.
Honestly, most ads are extremely disgusting for lesbians like myself.

 

[LewdDewd2024]

The ones I can't see.

 

[Munder_Score]

So, am I the only one who is seeing Chat GPT for anal sex ads, or am I the only one who absolutely adores them? I suppose they could be targeted just to me as I do search for anal sex more than probably anyone else west of the Mississippi. Why you ask? Well, that is a difficult question to answer...I suppose it all began one summer night when I was 21 years old, you see in those days you were considered a man at that age, and I had just taken over my father's sugar cane plantation in Santa Lucia. I was strolling through the cane fields attempting to scare away any of the disgusting cane rats that spread cane blight fungus to my saccharine stalks. The air was moist and warm, and there was a luscious breeze that brought with it the rich aromas of the cane blossoms. Off in the distance I could barely hear rhythmic rustling, a drumlike thumping mixed with the sound of leaves being disturbed. I had known ever since I was a small boy that some of the more amorous young villagers would often sneak into the cane rows to couple in the night. My curiosity piqued I dropped into a slinking crouch and slithered my way toward the beating and rustling that I was certain was 2 townsfolk that could not contain their concupiscent energies. As I approached I began to make out animalistic mewling and braying, still distinctly human, surely a young milkmaid being ravaged by her lover in the dark, in the night. When I had finally arrived to the source of what I was certain was a sexual tryst, my eyes widened in shock as my eyes focused on a formless dark silhouette, like living smoke in a large brimmed hat. A scream caught in my throat, I had heard tales of Los Vigilantes Oscuros, but until that dreadful moment I had never believed. Though no features could be distinguished, no eyes or face to speak of, still I could tell that this dark visage had trained its malevolent intentions on me. It was all I could to to force my legs to backpedal through the cane as fast as they would take me, sugar cane stalks bending and snapping under my hasty retreat. I don't know how I escaped Los Vigilantes Oscuros and exited those fields, but somehow I did. My clothes were tattered and shredded by the cane and covered in their syrup-like excretions, my breath ragged and deep, the taste of sugar coating my tongue and filling my burning lungs. When I finally dragged myself into my home still shivering with fear, I drew myself a warm bath, grabbed my Ipad mini and typed into the search bar "skinny Russian teen anal with jeans around thighs". As you can imagine that video was pretty hot, because she didn't take her jeans off, she just sort of rolled them down her thighs and then was anally penetrated. I'm not sure if she liked it or not, her facial expression was fairly unreadable, I like to imagine she did though. So, yeah Chat GPT for anal reminds me a bit of that.

 

[Shadowneya]

The ones I can't see.

These are my favorite as well... I have enough going on in my head 26hrs a day... I don't need more.